Hey Superman, you ain’t so tough!

Justice League - The Search for Hawkgirl
Justice League – The Search for Hawkgirl (Photo credit: Arnold Ho)

Obviously I am a massive superhero fan. It goes WAY back to the famed Saturday morning cartoon days when superheroes were everywhere. I was a Justice League fan, Spiderman, Batman and Robin, Batfink and Karate and of course Hong Kong Phooey fan. I enjoyed Captain Caveman but he couldn’t hold a candle to Aquaman. I am pretty sure this is where my love of men with shoulders and chests came into play.

I grew up in the 70’s. This was the era of prime time superhero TV! Wonderwoman was fabulous in her invisible jet. Isis was rocken her jewelery, and live action Spiderman would fling lame fishnets spiderwebs on every bad guy J. Jonah Jamison felt sympathy for. I was a sucker for every one of those shows. I even watched the original Adventures of Superman TV series with George Reeves every morning before school, but when it came to Superman, I just wasn’t feeling it.

My dad is a massive Superman fan. He loves superman like I love the muppets. He is fun to buy for. Last year I bought him a Superman coin bank. Every time you put coins in, his cape lifts up and waves in the wind. Superman merchandise is very cool. It isn’t enough to get me all excited though. The irony of the situation is, I love a red cape. None of my favorite heroes rock a red cape. Ironman? Nope. Thor? Nope. Batfink? Nope. Spiderman? Nope. Wolverine? Nope. Although secretly I think Magnito and Xavier have private red cape time in their lairs.

So what is the deal? I loves me a nice gorgeous red cape. The family is currently watching the 2006 version of Superman – Superman Returns. I can sit through EVERY SINGLE HERO ACTION MOVIE and become entranced. Every single one except any Superman movie. I am constantly picking apart the credibility of the events. As if Thor can be real… I become so anti-superman I must leave the room because I am too annoying. Snide comments spill from my lips like – Pshhh how is that possible? Too bad so sad Superman, there are no longer phonebooths available. Besides – everyone saw you undress in them anyways – they are made of glass.

To be kind – I just leave the room and let the Superman fans watch in adoration. I do understand their love for the adventure of super heroes…just not him. Maybe it’s because he is an alien. Or maybe because I hate his hair. Or maybe because Lois Lane is the only one he rescues. Or maybe his nemesis is also lame.Or maybe… he was born a superhero and the others rose to the challenge. It’s like the difference between a Rockerfeller or Todd McFarlane. One was born into weath and the other worked for it.

My dad and another friend are gigantic fans of Smallville. I must admit I have never watched it. I promised I would give it an honest go at it. I am secretly regretting that promise. I hope I won’t mock my way through it in an effort to sit through the entire episode. Or WORSE, what if I like it? Crap… I never thought of that scenario. Liking Superman? Puullleeeeease. Shoot me now. I’d rather watch something completely plausible like…The Incredible Hulk or Electrawoman and Dynagirl…

9 thoughts on “Hey Superman, you ain’t so tough!

  1. I agree with your anti-Superman bias. It’s like he was born privileged (except for the whole Kryptonite-will-kill-me thing). I’ve been a fan of Spiderman ever since he made those appearances on The Electric Company back in the 70s.

  2. I’m not anti-Supeman, and Spiderman always kind of creeped me out because I don’t like spiders all that much. I think with Superman, it’s that there is something vaguely metrosexual about him. A gay superhero I can endorse, but a closeted one? Hmmm……

    1. Lol metro superman…my dad will be horrified 😉 but putting it that way, I’m now looking at him in a different light. He still is born privileged so doesn’t get the whole concept of rising to the top…

      1. Okay… “rising to the top”….? Lol.

        Iron Man is my current fav, bc I like a smart smartass. :-). But, like you, I am an Aquaman devotee… Strong shoulders and chest…. Yes, please!

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