I Have Muppet Swag and YOU Don’t

I saw this tour bus and I went nuts! The enthusiasm exuded from my pores. My daughter was completely slightly embarrassed. I was over the moon!

I quickly took a picture and ran up to the bus to see if it was one of those Disney Interactive things! No such luck. The bus was empty and the driver just stared blankly at me. Not deterred, I was anxious to enter the movie theatre to see if the Muppets were inside.

We were greeted at the door by a guy in a blue leisure suit and a gal in a polka dot dress. They approached ChatterBox and asked if she would like a movie poster. She said sure. I said, “But I’m a bigger Muppet fan than her, may I have one too?” The fellow was very kind and gave me some awesome Muppet Swag! I asked if those crazy Muppets were around and he said, “No it’s too cold.” Ummm, too cold? They are MADE OF FUR! I didn’t buy that for a second, pfffffff too cold – whatever. But I understood what his stance was, -26C is too cold for humans, never mind Muppets, so we were stuck with them. I chatted happily about how much I love those furry guys so they asked if they could take my picture. I said sure, did my best Diva Miss Piggy Pose and CLICK! They took it with an old fashion digital, the kind that doesn’t email or upload to twitter. I asked the purpose of the photo and was told it was for promotions to show marketing does work and generate excitement.

Hell Ya! I was super excited over a poster and bookmarks! If I had a locker at school, it would be going up on the door! As it is, I may frame it and hang it in my office. ChatterBox reminded me she needed to get to her friend’s birthday party. They were seeing Breaking Dawn. What else would teen girls being seeing? (Go Naked Team Jacob!) So we found her friends gathered and I chatted briefly with some parents, when that Guy in the Blue Suit walked up behind me to get ChatterBox’s attention.


He opened his jacket in such a way I thought he was selling hot watches, but he had a stuffed Miss Piggy for ChatterBox because she was so enthusiastic.

I was OUTRAGED! I was the enthusiastic one, I am the biggest fan! I watched the muppets since the 60’s THE 60’S PEOPLE! And she is the one who gets the Pig. Not Cool Blue Suit guy, Not Cool.

I then confiscate her Pig and bid her fun and farewell. I march right over to BlueSuit guy and say “Thanks for Miss Piggy, but she won’t share. Have a lovely day!” BlueSuit Guy stopped me and said, “Come with me to the Bus”

TO THE BUS! This was either a pick up line or I was about to get my own Piggy! YAY! He was cute, but I was hoping for Piggy, or better yet, Kermit!

I followed BlueSuitGuy into the sacred Muppet Bus, he scurried down the aisle and said, “For you, I have something BETTER!” What could be better than a stuffed Kermit?

He held up a Muppet Limited edition Monopoly Game. LIMITED EDITION PEOPLE! I know you are jealous and you should be because it is AWESOME! I Squealed “SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” and claped my hands, did the Muppet Dance (flail your arms about and throw your head back) and THANKED HIM profusely! I asked his name and requested I take HIS picture. Liam said, “Of Course! and Blog about it!” So I am…

I brought my swag home to brag to Genetic OffSpring. He was the proper amount of jealous to make me feel good. In the evening we cracked open the game. I know, Limited Edition and now its ruined. But I like this version (v.M.1) way better than standard Monopoly. That is until…

Those rotten kids of mine ran me into the ground and forced bankrupcy. I even had Kermit and Piggy’s Place (Boardwalk and Park Place equivalent) Genetic OffSpring put on his mob hat and used skeamy fingers every time I landed on his Movie Studio.

Once I was finally out of cash and mortgaged EVERYTHING I owned, I said,”well since I lost, I will clean the kitchen.” My EVIL ChatterBox replied with a “Ya you will.”

Hold the phone there Missy!!! What did you just say? Clearly my kids are now dead to me.

Funny thing is, I secretly feel proud of their tycoon and cut throat ways. Genetic OffSpring said, “I’m not here to make friends, its a game.”

Obviously I am the BEST MOM EVER! I have not only raised readers, I have raised Mob Godfathers.



8 thoughts on “I Have Muppet Swag and YOU Don’t

  1. I would be flipping out over that bus too! In Edmonton of all places?!? I’m planning to take my kids to see the Muppets movie this weekend, I might have only seen reruns in the 80’s but I still love them.

  2. I am excited and proud to say that I definitely showed my age a few weeks ago when my sister, brother and I all went to see Footloose and there was a Muppets Movie preview. Along with all the little teeny-boppers (you can only imagine just how many) sitting there and my sister and I were laughing hysterically! No one else really “got it” hahaha…..I am seeing it on Sunday!! Aren’t you so excited? (I think you are just a little bit!)

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