Google is Your Friend and Mine

When I get asked questions I do not know the answer to ( Strange, I know! Don’t tell the Offspring, I like to keep the illusion of brilliancy), I always answer with “Google is your friend!” Google has been my friend for a long time and Google refers a lot of readers to me. But did you know that people ask Google the craziest questions to find me? I will do my best to answer them for you people who are seeking the answer and stumbled onto my blog.

Favourite colour yoga mat: Blue, Tiffany Blue actually. If you are going to colour it in a colouring book, then use #7 peacock blue by Laurentian.

My favorite colour: Really? You needed to ask Google that? Google is not a mind reader it is a SEARCH ENGINE. I think your favorite colour is Red.

Iceberg on 11th highway in Edmonton: Hmmm, listen pal, I think you need more science education. Iceburgs are not found on highways in Edmonton. If fact, let’s throw in a geography lesson too. Edmonton does not have any highways. It has freeways and is SURROUNDED by highways. Meanwhile, go to Newfoundland to check out the icebergs.

Do drag queens wear synthetic hair? Yes and No. Some Drag Queens buy hair and some grow it. Now you know.

Am I a control freak or just bossy? Again, Google isn’t a mind reader it’s a SEARCH ENGINE. I think you are a control freak…but that is just my opinion.

Happy birthday in heaven grandma. Aw that is sweet. But Google isn’t a direct link to heaven. You can sit anywhere and just talk to her, even wish her a happy birthday…just saying.

Sick from child licking the bathroom floor. No kidding?? That makes me sick too! What a coincidence!

Express avenue escape rest room. I think you came to the wrong source looking for answers, you need GAME CHEATS…again, just saying…

Sissy wanted Edmonton. Ouch?! Am not! You are! I am rubber you are glue…

Paul Coffey sister. I am not her. Nor do I know her. However, I have met Mark Messier’s Sister and SHE is BUFF! Just saying…

There is bears in Edmonton.  Once I heard about a black bear in the river valley…just once. Don’t worry, they won’t eat you.

Face painter was mean. I was not! But if you have any complaints about my attitude…I don’t care.

“sex-training of boys”. Seriously you googled THAT to find me??? WOW. How does one respond to that?

Bossy teacher. Yes I am.

I am a genius. Me too my friend, me too.

Common sense … don’t leave home without it. That is just good practice people!

гонзо маппет. What does this mean? So I took my own advice a googled it. Gonzo Muppet is the answer. What does that say about my nose?

Master Jedi dishwasher. Yes I am. Thank you for noticing.

Thanks Google for sending all those readers to my blog. I am glad I could help.

4 thoughts on “Google is Your Friend and Mine

  1. The one about licking the bathroom floor, makes me wonder was the child sick from licking the bathroom floor or was the adult sick from watching their child lick the bathroom floor? Maybe both!

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