The Christmas Bills are in! And the winner is….. Master Card. Well isn’t that just priceless.
We strived for a leaner Christmas and succeeded, but Crimemany Crickets gifts are pricey. Did I get a Tiffany filled box under the tree? No siree bob! Was there a plethora of pretty boxes and ribbons under the tree? Nope. Are the Offspring left feeling hard done by? Nope. Am I?
Good Question. Am I? Maybe a little. There isn’t anything I really want. There wasn’t anything anyone really wanted- and if there was they got it. Doesn’t that sound like we are bunch of spoiled brats? To some extent I suppose we are. So why do I feel like I didn’t get what I want for Christmas?
I suppose it is all part of my tourist transition. Leaving the Caterpillar me behind and transforming into the Chrysalis. Eric Carle ( The Very Hungry Caterpillar) says 14 sleeps before I am a butterfly. He is a big fat liar. It has been 147 days since I have started this journey and today is a rough patch. Intellectually I understand that money doesn’t buy you happiness. But it does pay bills and take major stress away. I think I need to regroup and make a list of attainable items I need for my transition.
1> A Career Upgrade. I like my job. I REALLY like my team. I REALLY REALLY like how aspects of it make me laugh. But… Did you hear that coming? BUT my job is becoming mundane. For those of you who know what I do I know you are laughing. Maybe it is mundane because the challenge is gone. An Upgrade is in order. Before I can get an Upgrade, I need to finish my degree. Crap. That is taking forEVER. Next class starts Monday. I am maintaining an even keel. I guess that part of my life is on track – Check!
2>I suffered an injury on my vacation to Europe that has made me feel like I am crippled. It is holding me back and starting to make other parts of my body angry so they are hurting too. My Doc says, time is all it needs. Crap. I am giving it more love and coddling then I give my offspring. It still hates me and it is a big baby about it. This is the first time in my life where I wish I was younger so I could heal faster. I can hear my beloved Great Aunt Sister D “all it will take is three shakes of a dead lambs tail, then it will be right as rain” Dead Lambs don’t move very fast, I just noticed that. I am taking it slow. Check!
3>School is expensive. It takes a ton of time and money. I wish I could just go back full-time and be done with it. I noticed Genetic Offspring is a giant today. He grows faster then I can blink. Little Chatterbox isn’t little any more. She eats and grows too. I put my foot down yesterday. She asked for another pair of jeans. She has 4 that fit her. I have 1. I decided I don’t want to give up the possibility of having another pair of jeans so she can have a new pair. Time for her to get a job. Maybe I can get them to stop eating too. Check!
3> I need an intellectual challenge. School isn’t doing that for me. I thought it might. I have learned that I know a lot of stuff that makes my job easier. I have also learned it is the same stuff they want me to learn for my degree.The stuff I don’t know, is logical and easy to find. Then I know it and makes my job easier too. That is a win\win situation. It doesn’t help me intellectually. Blogs I read help. The Arts really help. Stranger friends I have met on FB help too. The Metropolitan Opera in New York is showing a series of operas at the local cinema this spring. They will be simulcast live in the theater. I think I want to go. If you wish to join me and then engage in conversation about what we experienced, I would love for you to join me. If that’s not your bag, that’s fine too. The internet has become a great way for me to meet people who also have the need to share thoughts and ideas. Check!
So where does that leave me?
I need patience. Rats, okay fine I will work on that.
I need my injury to heal. Rats, that needs patience.
I need money. Rats, okay fine, patience will help me out with that too.
I need an intellectual challenge. Rats, I see a pattern forming here. Patience will lead me to the intellectual challenge I need.
Stupid Patience! I am not liking you very much right now.
I can do this. Slow and steady wins the race. Patience is a virtue. Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera… Alright my dearest readers, start throwing clichés at me so I can get through the week. Thanks for being there for me xxx